Feeling Snarky

I know this is politically incorrect and not fact-checky and not my usual cup of tea. But it's late, I got little sleep and I'm feeling like sniping at the conservatives* tonight.

Pulled these from here.

--If you grow up in Hawaii you're 'exotic.'
--Grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers, you're the quintessential 'American story.'

--Similarly, if you name your kid Barack you're 'unpatriotic.'
--Name your kids Trig and Track, you're 'colorful.'

--If you spend 3 years as a community organizer growing your organization from a staff of 1 to 13 and your budget from $70,000 to $400,000, then become the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new African American voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, then spend nearly 8 more years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, becoming chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, then spend nearly 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of nearly 13 million people, sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you are woefully inexperienced.

--If you spend 4 years on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, then spend 20 months as the governor of a state with 650,000 people, you've got the most executive experience of anyone on either ticket, are the Commander in Chief of the Alaska military and are well qualified to lead the nation should you be called upon to do so because your state is the closest state to Russia.

--If you go to a south side Chicago church, your beliefs are 'extremist'.
--If you believe in creationism and don't believe global warming is man-made, you are 'strongly principled'.

--If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.
--If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years with whom you are raising two beautiful daughters you're 'risky'.

--If you're a 13-year-old Chelsea Clinton, the right-wing press calls you 'First dog.'
--If you're a 17-year old pregnant unwed daughter of a Republican, the right-wing press calls you 'beautiful' and 'courageous.'

--If you teach abstinence only in sex education, you get teen parents.
--If you teach responsible age-appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.

--End--

*If you're a conservative reading this, considered yourself warned. And please know that if you're a friend of mine that I understand you have your own viewpoint; I respect you for it. Furthermore, I'm sure you could cite just as many examples in reverse. Feel free to do so on your own blogs.