3.20.2009

Santa -- Yes! Easter Bunny -- No.

Through a highly-scientific survey process (read as: I asked a couple of teachers and students during recess yesterday), I have determined the following:

The Easter Bunny is downright creepy.

Not the concept of the Easter bunny. Not the idea of jellybeans, Peeps, Cadbury Creme Eggs, colored eggs. No, it's the actual bunny.

Folks dressed up in bunny suits for children's events, in particular.

I get a lot of e-mail. A lot. I'm not that popular a person, but I sign up for mailing lists, free offers, coupons, that sort of thing. Recently, every restaurant, tourist information board, Chamber of Commerce I've ever had any contact with has been contacting me with various bunny-related activities. Breakfast with the Easter Bunny, Welcome the Easter Bunny to the Mall, Brunch with the Easter Bunny, Steam Train Ride with the Easter Bunny, Car Wash with the Easter Bunny, Lap-Dance with the Easter Bunny ... (OK, maybe I made up one or two of those)

And, we all know what these events will entail ... a giant bunny-suited individual who may or may not talk through a bewhiskered, screened-in mouth frozen in a rictus of Easter-loving joy. An eight-foot, bowtied, tailcoated horror in fluffy white faux fur.

They're downright creepy.

I understand the need to "make fantasy come alive" for children. I understand the props and costumes and so forth to make Santa and Rudolph and all "real" for our kids. I take the kids to see Santa. I encourage the letter writing. I make sure we leave out cookies and milk and that they're at least partially consumed by morning. But ... the Easter Bunny?

I don't get it. And more than that ... it's creepy. I can't find a better word for it. OK, well, maybe I can. Disturbing. It's disturbing.

Some big sweaty men with fursuit fetishes are taking advantage of our children, and I don't care for it, not one little bit. And somehow, the "face" suit bunnies are even weirder. You know the type ... some perfectly genial intern or college student (usually female) dresses up in a pastel jacket, waistcoat (with obligatory pocket watch), plaid pants. Then there are obscenely large furry feet and mitts sticking out of the ends of the garments. Odd, wired-shaped ears stick up from a crooked headband or hood-like contraption. Then there's the biggest ick-factor ... the nose/whiskers/buck teeth prosthesis. There's nothing about this that says, "Trust me, I'm loveable and mean you no harm."

Beware the Bunny, friends.

--End--

ps. I'm not the only one to think so. I just Googled easter bunny creepy and found a lot of back-up. Like this gallery, or this Flickr image.

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