9.29.2014

Observations

Today's to-do list had twelve items on it.

One of which is writing a blog post.

I've checked off four items, but added six new ones.

Today and tomorrow, we get paid. Once I pay bills, we have maybe $100 to last until the next payday.*

My bursitis seems to be alleviated, but I still have no idea what caused it.

Joe turns 44 on Wednesday. That is an age that once would've seemed very old to me. When I look at him, he seems very nearly the same Joe I met in 1989.

 I miss being onstage. Like a sickness.

My brain is rushing ahead to the future (planning for Thanksgiving, Christmas, next summer), rather than focusing on the present. This leaves me feeling both rushed to complete all the tasks (though many have deadlines weeks or more away), as well as feeling like life is passing me by (though it's my own fault my focus is so misplaced).

If anyone wants to give me some mums for my front porch, I'd be most appreciative.

Next up on the house projects: spackling, sanding and painting the finished basement.

*I really need to plan ahead better for my four missed paychecks in the summer. Otherwise, September and October are just always a fiscal nightmare.

9.22.2014

Hello, Fall!

Fall is my favorite season of the year. I think it always has been. I love the changing leaves, the crisp, cool nights, the layers of clothes, marching band and football games, Halloween, Thanksgiving. I really love all of it.

However, for the past few days ... a week, maybe ... I've been in a funk. I don't know if it's a lack of exposure to sunlight, a lack of quality sleep, back-to-school stress, fall allergies (of which I have a few), the financial pressure this time of year* or a nasty combination of all-of-the-above. In any case, I've been feeling blue. Inadequate to the task (teaching, parenting, wifing, selfing ... pick one). Lackluster.

I don't know if it's my obedience to my digital overlords (mobile device addict, here), fatigue, or it's my malaise coloring my perspective of my life (or, again, all-of-the-above) ... but I just don't feel truly present in my life. I feel as though I do many things, but that I'm not sure who I am.

And then I feel the angsty guilt over feeling this way. Part of me (I think it's my mom's voice inside my head) tells me to suck it up, count my blessings and move on. And I feel guilty for not doing just that.

I think I'll try to eliminate variables and focus on getting a good night's sleep each night this week. And, I'll try to get some sunshiny outdoors time, too. The dog could use some walks around the block, after all.

I'll let you know how it goes.

*I don't get paid for July and August, which is always hard to plan for, plus ... we're coming into Christmas spending....

P.S. Apparently the "fall blues" is totally a thing.

9.15.2014

Resurfacing?

My last blog post was back in July. I said I'd post again when I came up for air. I guess that took longer than I'd thought it would. Let's see ... what has happened since then?

Spamalot was an outrageous hit. Joe couldn't have made me prouder in the lead role. The entire cast was stellar and friendly and hilarious. Several performances sold out. We hosted an epic cast party (or two) at our house. All-in-all, a spectacular success.

We made an epic road-trip excursion Out West. My Facebook and Instagram friends followed our progress driving across Pennsylvania, Ohio, Illinois, Indiana, Missouri, Kansas, Colorado, Wyoming, South Dakota, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan and back. We visited numerous national parks and monuments, saw more wildlife than ever before, and experienced the wonders of man-made and natural wonders across our country. I also wound up in the ER following a two-hour ambulance ride and struggled with keeping up with responsibilities back home via the ever-sketchy-at-best cell service.

School restarted. Joe returned to his college math classes, Emily began tenth grade (now at the senior high) and Matthew started eighth grade (his final year at the middle school), and I returned to my K-8 computer classes. I've also started teaching two college classes, which keeps me busy four nights a week. The kids are in marching band this time of year, too. So, that's two night rehearsals per week, plus a football game and competition every weekend.

So ... maybe I'm not quite above water yet. Talk to me more about that during Christmas break.

7.21.2014

Tech Week

This is tech week. I am at the theatre a lot. And when I'm home, I'm trying to chill, and I'm baking.

On tap for baking this week: soft gingersnaps, oatmeal-butterscotch, peanut butter, soft sugar cookies

See you when I resurface.

7.14.2014

Fun With Friends

Adrienne really put it very well. So much fun hanging with them throughout their visit.

7.02.2014

Mountains Beat the Sea

http://bfc6069c43f7ffbc5dba-0502af2ee568fe969e1c3ea7c42e34f6.r90.cf1.rackcdn.com/images/Denver_g.jpg
I have not seen anything that looks like this.

This is the first glimpse I got of the Rockies on this trip. The view hasn't improved much since then.
Periodically throughout the past 36 hours, ever since I arrived in Denver, my eyes are drawn to the West, hoping to catch a glimpse of the Rocky Mountains.

This time of year, many of my friends are posting pictures of their feet and a view of the ocean. Toes in the sand, blue skies, surf ... that sort of thing.

And, while I love a good Shore day, I've always been able to do without sand. I love the Boardwalk, the fries, the ocean breeze, the fresh air. But, my idea of the perfect Shore day doesn't involve any time actually in the ocean, and doesn't necessarily have to include actually touching the sand. It's not because I grew up sans beach. On the contrary, I was raised mere minutes from miles of pretty decent beach at Lake Erie.

Nope, for me, it's the mountains. I love a view across valleys. I love the crisp air at altitude. I love the clear, dry skies and the scent of pine. I love windy mountain roads, sledding, hiking.

Spending Christmas in the Poconos is far closer to my idea of bliss than spending 4th of July at the Shore (though I really, really miss our weeks of cramming a jillion Dugans into a shore house for the week of the 4th).

Sand is annoying. Mountains make me feel at home.

6.30.2014

Stuff to Do

And not much time to do it ...

Today I have to
  1. buy a window air-conditioner for our spare room.
  2. meet Joe for lunch
  3. work on my Rowan University syllabus
  4. work on my Cumberland County College syllabus
  5. update the program book for Spamalot
  6. go for a run
  7. get the kids to do chores
  8. update the Cumberland Players website
  9. shower (see #6)
  10. check-in online for my flight tomorrow*
  11. pack for my trip
  12. go to bed early (I have to leave my house at 4:30 a.m.)
* I'm a state delegate, representing Cumberland County, of the National Education Association Representative Assembly in Denver. I'll be back on the morning of July 8.